soldade is a brazilian portuguese word. a brilliant beautiful word. it kind of roughly translates "a longing for something unseen, unknown, or remembered", "nostalgia" maybe...its a feeling one gets. an aching sort of longing. maybe even like "deja vous" a feeling you get that you cant quite put a finger on. there is a wildness to it. something passionate behind it.
we all get these moments. right?
i get this when i see fingers of ice against a black night sky. when i close my eyes in the sunshine, sipping coffee, as my babies play at my feet. when i open an old box filled with treasures gathered from around the globe. the smell of birch bark, which takes me back to siberia. the scent of cigarettes early in the morning, mixed with traffic smells. the sound of rain on a tent. these sort of multi-sensory moments. that make us remember, forget, long...
longing is an essential part of the human spirit though isnt it? that passion that takes us through the mundane. diapers to be washed. cheerios to vacuum off the floor. grubby fingers. aching backs. hours to bill. and etc. etc. etc. the mudane seems to never let go. the extraordinary always around the corner, over the rainbow maybe. yet....i aim to find the extraordinary in the mundane. it needs to be hammered down. noticed. taken apart and observed for what it is. embraced. you know?
i have grubby fingers that depend on me for washing. little rosy bottoms to wrap up in fuzzy clean diapers. little fingers to throw cheerios on the floor. little bodies to carry around that lead to said aching back. it sounds trite but, god, what a miracle is that! mothering never struck me as an adventure. but what an adventure it is!
so, what makes you "tenho soldade"?
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Beautiful--the post and the blog page! And I got to be your very first follower! Yay for new years!
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