somewhere in between.

i am somewhere in between now and then. my head is cloudy with thoughts of next and what if and when.

but then grubby fingers on either side of my cheeks pull my eyes back into focus.

"me me mommy. me."

yes you, little fingers. yes you little toes. you little eyes, smiling up at me, calling for me to enjoy the here and the now and all that is good and great in this little world. sunbeams. gentle rain. afternoons spent dumping rocks in a wading pool. changing shoes three times in ten minutes. "walk walk!" yes, you little girl.

and you, growing fingers. hair in your pretty brown eyes, almost too pretty for the rough and tough boy you try to be. you are a sweet soul. trying to be big, trying so hard. your silky red cape flying behind you as you climb mountains and fly space ships and hunt tigers in a jungle of lilacs. you, my sweet boy.

thank you for being with me in the inbetween. for calling me to the now.